First things first: Two months until Christmas! Ho! Ho! Ho!
The whole idea of blogging is to write at least a few lines on a regular basis. I get it; and even knowing this, I've been a bad, bad blogger.
There aren't any excuses to explain it away. I think I already mentioned that I don't like to be the center of attention - which might make anyone ask why in the world I chose to blog?
Good question. Really, good question. While I think some of it has to do with that, the other is I am in such a quandary. I don't know where I am in life, and that confuses & puzzles me. Everything just seems to be scattered. I don't know how to explain it. I don't think it's suppose to be explainable. How can you make sense on anything that has so many open-ended questions?
There aren't any excuses to explain it away. I think I already mentioned that I don't like to be the center of attention - which might make anyone ask why in the world I chose to blog?
Good question. Really, good question. While I think some of it has to do with that, the other is I am in such a quandary. I don't know where I am in life, and that confuses & puzzles me. Everything just seems to be scattered. I don't know how to explain it. I don't think it's suppose to be explainable. How can you make sense on anything that has so many open-ended questions?
Someone sent me a link to a breast cancer website, & I realize it was sent to me with good intentions; it ended up depressing me. You decide . I have not read it. I don't want to read it.
I meet with my oncologist tomorrow afternoon. We scheduled my Vampire day at hematology just before the doctor's appointment. Tomorrow I should learn about the bone density scan & see if the tumor is shrinking (I think it is). I have a lot of questions. I really like this doctor, & as much as I hate going to the doctor's, I'm looking forward to this visit.
I've been taking my cancer drug 29 days now. I think the tumor is shrinking. The tumor just may have moved around a little or maybe it's my imagination, but I am sure hoping to learn it is a little smaller. Wouldn't that be great? The biggest side effect I have with this drug so far, is the hot flashes. I actually feel as if I'm sitting next to a furnace. I do itch, and I've lost head hair, though my hair was thinning even before taking this drug. But it does seem as if I'm losing more than I was before. Who knows? The hot flashes will come in handy this winter.
I have to hand it to my son. He is with me for each of my appointments. I am thankful for his support, but I worry about becoming a burden. I have to eat before they Vampire my blood, so we'll have brunch out at the Cracker Barrel. I'm hoping for pancakes & bacon. Mmmm ....
1 comment:
I think a site that features a lengthy excerpt entitled WALK TOWARD DEATH is exceedingly depressing.
When I was going through menopause, I found the whole topic depressing. Usually I love to read about medical things, but I didn't read a damned thing about it and still haven't.
Maybe you could read only what interests you, and just let the doctors handle the rest.
I hope this medicine has helped, and you finally get a morsel of good news tomorrow.
While this is a pretty big responsibility for your son, he will be able to look back on this as a significant accomplishment in his life. Even though it was hard, painful, scary, etc., he stood by his mother's side to help her through her tough times. You must be very proud of him.
So what's this about Christmas? Bahhh humbug, I say!
*Hugs*
Valerie (Chemisse)
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